Still, I couldn't have anticipated the swift, sharp pain inflicted by three letters married together. "Our." As in his and his wife's.
And I think He realized the moment that simple pronoun left his lips, that it went straight through my heart.
I'm an "and they lived happily ever after" kind of girl. And I know that in the movie or the book, I'd want Him to remain loyal to his true love. There would be no me.
But there is a me, and I wonder whether there can be a happy ending to my story. And if so, what would it be? That my feelings slowly fade until I can walk off in to the sunset. Alone, but toward my own "our."
Posts
Gulp, Hugs
ReplyDelete*hugs you tight*
ReplyDeleteVery painful that one little word when you aren't included in it.
ReplyDeleteAlthough this post doesn't communicate it, things have been much better/easier for me since I decided NOT to run away from Him and my feelings for Him. (See The Runaway Sub post earlier this month).
ReplyDeleteStill, there are moments -- such as the one when He used the word "our" -- that are painful. That make my mind turn and my stomach drop. And sometimes I just torment myself with "what if's".
I do wonder, though, how this can continue -- or end, for that matter -- without me being terribly hurt. But I'm committed to finding out where this takes me. Where it takes us. Because although I'm not part of "our" there is an "us".
my heart says "ouch" for you DDD... you are going in heart and eyes open... just keep a little back for yourself, ok?
ReplyDeletexxk
kk: I've missed you and your kind and thoughtful words. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI agree, procede my dear, but with caution, for leaving the stage before the play is over means you never get to know what 'happens in the end'
ReplyDeleteMollyxxx
Very well put, Molly. Thank you.
ReplyDelete